Rat Race

She stood up and walked to the mirror

Desperately looking for herself, where had she gone, was it all an error?

Faint, fragile, void settled in her realm. Filling her being with nothingness that tuned into terror.

Wast it just a moment of panic, she asked herself, as she felt staleness consume her.

She did miss those moments of plain joyful stillness.

Moments where there was no need to please, to convince or even impress.

Only if she could find an escape from herself. A recess!

She looked deeper into herself.

Looking at her face,

It all felt out of place.

Eager to keep up with the pace,

She lost who she was in this rat race.

Funny how even the tears and sweat didn't calm all the fears.

Foes and fears that were justified.

But perhaps shouldn't be gratified.

After all she had given it her all, putting it all at the first place.

The air tightened up around her, where was she being led?

Were all these steps leading to nowhere land, invalid?

When did she even become timid?

When did the lil fire dim so low to become a fading memory?

A memory far from how she envisioned her new reality to be.

No longer vivid.

Plainly livid.

She longed for the time she was so sure, so lucid.....

But what is there to look forward to, if you don't throw yourself in the deep and learn how to swim?

What is there to look forward to if you don't jump off the cliff and learn how to fly young girl?

Dress: The Fix (made in South Africa for the win)

Jacket: YDE (Amber)

Thigh High Socks: Woolworths

Boots: Cotton On

Hat: Mr Price

Jewelry: The Fix 

Agent Provocatrice: I ain't sorry

"I ain't sorry ni**a, nah!" Yes, I am very much referring to Lemonade. Yes Bey done gave me all the creative juices I needed. What an album and film people!!! It evoked and awakened all these emotions I am sure every woman can relate to, at one point or another. One song that stood out for me was 'Sorry'. Although its title sounds apologetic, it meant the opposite to me. It meant that women, more specifically Black women, ought to stop apologizing for being who they are and how they were created. 

More often than not, we, Black women are born and bred in misogynistic and repression preaching societies. These type of societies are driven by the male ego, which needs rubbing and yes Sir's for 'its survival' and apparent well being. The same  societies teach women to keep quiet, to be ever lovely and pleasing, smile at all times, act dumb because apparently it's the only form in which pretty comes in (rolling my eyes ).

 In my opinion, Sorry is here to teach us women to say no to being sized up, pinned up, criticized, modified into dolls. We are not dolls, we are not meant to be dolls; we are living and breathing creatures with a voice we need to make more use of, with feelings that need to be considered and emotions that need to be protected. We are not here to merely please, but to be pleased as well. 

The song invokes, in me, the need to reject normalcy and embrace originality. Embrace the fact that I am a limited edition, one that is wonderfully and fearfully made. A being that does not have to be politically correct to appease the apprehension and anxieties of the male or anyone else for that matter. A being that does not have to be subjected to what society says I ought or not ought to be. One that does not have to wear heels in order to be more lady like or less expressive to be sweet enough for society's taste. If having an opinion, seeking financial independence and stability before companionship, standing firm in my belief, being strong willed and driven are man-repellers, so be it. I ain't thinkin' 'bout you and I ain't sorry!

When it's not a matter of repressing self expression, it's a matter of emotional regression. Apart of the fact that apparently Black women are feisty, we are supposedly the epitome of strength. False resilience portrayed in the acceptance  of BS, smiles and long silences; because 'maintaining the peace' is far more important than self-respect. Yet the need to acknowledge our vulnerability, humanity and emotions is far more urgent than ever. 

It's in the same spirit of emotional regression that victims of sexual abuse and assault are asked what they were wearing when the incident happened. As if the role of the offender is reversible or exchangeable. 

So basically the lessons taught in the society are that: you don't cry, the only way to be strong is to keep quiet and smile through the agony. But wait, who said that we were emotional Hercules under all that choco? 

Sadly, it's in the same tone of  denial that we forgive and overlook abuse; because well, if you look hard enough he loves me. But love doesn't hurt. It doesn't. If there are sacrifices to be made, they are not intended in that way. And no, a man is not a dress that you can alter to fit you. So walk away without being apologetic about your decision. 

So let's stop making excuses for wrongdoers and for our bad decisions, and move forward. Forward with more self awareness and respect for our emotions, thoughts, opinion and feelings. Do not give time to those who question your dread locks and afros, and why it's not straight. Have no time for those who call you lazy, because you are curvy or question your blackness because you are thin. Neither should we be apologetic about choosing a road less traveled. We, Black women, have the right to occupy the earth and enjoy the resources as much as any other being. The difference is that we ought to want to and work towards writing a different and better story for ourselves.  

Let's raise a sisterhood that allows each flower to bloom. Let's allow ourselves to be free, free from comparison and full of compassion. Free to be vulnerable, free to express ourselves, free to demand respect and appreciation. Refuse to be ill treated, gain all the strength to choose yourself. Even if your story hasn't been a good one, make it a good one. Put some RESPECK on your name girl!

Style inspo: the 1990s. 

Jacket: Thrifted

Tee: Bello Diamond (it has a zip at the back, talk about edge suhn!)

Culottes: Mr Price

Heels: Madison 

Love and Light!

What is the true cost of my fleekness?

Hello there Fashion Lovers!

As most of you know or might have seen on social media, it’s FASHION REVOLUTION week (#FashRev)!!! The founder of the organisation and movement is designer Orsola de Castro. Fashion Revolution is an organisation that was created following the collapse of the Rana Plaza in Dhaka (Bangladesh) which killed 1100 factory workers. Fashion Revolution week spans from the April 18 to April 24 and is a week to remember and honor the lives of the victims of the Rana Plaza. The organisation aims to structurally and internally change the dynamics in the fashion industry; emphasizing and demanding more transparency from the supply chain. What is meant by transparency is to inquire and be informed about how garments are produced,  conditions in which  workers are working and whether human rights and labor laws are observed in the wake of capitalism, high returns to scale and fast fashion.

Following the screening of ‘TRUE COST’ at the Cape Town College of Fashion Design, yesterday; my whole outlook on threads, garments, design, production, human rights and consumerism changed! Actually, my whole outlook on life changed, as I found myself questioning my consumption pattern! In the documentary, I got to be awakened to the alarming reality of the fashion industry, one that is most prevalent and ever growing under our watch ‘Fast Fashion’. Fueled by consumerism, condoned by capitalism, fast fashion is all garments sold by giant retailers and most probably made in China, Bangladesh or India. Most of these garments are shown in the display windows of outlets every other quarter, as ‘seasons’ change inviting a new batch of ‘trendy’ clothing often labelled ‘cheap’ in the industry.

Calling these garments ‘cheap’ has no derogatory intent; it’s the fact of the matter and the truth we cannot run away from. The prices of clothes have fallen substantially at the expense of mass production with a growth of 400% in two decades. For example, a retail brand outsources a factory in China and requires them to produce about a million pants for a price of 30US cents/pair and resells them for 30$US/pair. The profits made here are substantial but no one will incur the cost of misusing the human capital. As much as production increased, the quality of a lot of these garments, at times, leaves a lot to desire. With the continued decrease of these prices, the wages of the workers are continuously pushed down to satisfy the corporation’s hunger for profits and the consumer’s need to be on ‘fleek’ and ‘trendy’. Furthermore, this drastic change led to the extinction of many textile and clothing industries in a lot of countries with more stringent labor laws. 

Some could argue that it’s for the better: it makes clothes more accessible to those at the lower end of the income bracket, allowing them to dress well and feel good. And after all, it is creating job opportunities for those garment production workers and giving them means to survive. But is that the truth or the illusion we decide to preach to ourselves? At the end of the day, the race to remain trendy is a difficult one. You could never be trendy, if every other month you are required to revamp your wardrobe because seasons changed and ‘newly in’s’ are a must have!! Not only does it increase your expenses, it does so at the opportunity cost of investments or other things which are more important and have a long term use. As said in the documentary, fashion should never be regarded as disposable. Simply because seeing/thinking/making it disposable is an insult to the creatives and the creative process. So as consumers what are we condoning and nurturing, after all it’s our money that sustains the corporations? What is actually the real cost the garment we purchase for less than 5$US every other week?

Well, here is a wake-up call and the reality of life:

• 1.       Fast Fashion earns about 3 trillion $US/ year in sales from garments mostly made in China, Bangladesh and India.
• 2.       There is 40 million factory workers in the world, of which 85% are mostly women and young girls (as young as 12 years old) who are forced to work an average of 18 hours/ day for a wage of less than 3$US/a day to barely survive.
• 3.       While the sales numbers were at a record high in 2013, the Rana Plaza in Dhaka (Bangladesh) collapsed. This plaza was an 8-story building in a bad condition which collapsed leading to the death of 1100 workers. (At this point, don’t you think it is alarming? Is that new dress – is the slayage -really worth someone’s life?)
• 4.       Fashion Industry is the second polluting industry after the oil industry. The levels of pollution are so high in some of the areas such as Punjab (India), that the factory workers and farmers get ill due to the exposure to toxins. The type of toxins and pollutants they are exposed to, such as chromium, lead to skin cancer and other types of cancer, liver disease and cerebrally handicaps children, etc. So, the reality of the farmer or the factory worker is that they cannot progress in life as no healthcare is provided to them. So, all that they earn or can save goes towards healthcare expense. So now, how much economic empowerment or standard of living improvement is made from their job? Not much! They are left bankrupt and unable to survive.
• 5.       In terms of production, some of the cotton seeds have been replaced by genetically modified seeds such as Bt Cotton. In order to maintain a cotton farm, a farmer in India has to borrow money (the price of a seed increased by 17 000 times relative to pre-1950). The prices of the seeds are so high, that when the farmers are unable to pay back, the corporations take their land and flood them with pesticides. These pesticides are not only polluting the earth but the more a farmer uses them; the more they have to buy to sustain the high levels of harvest demanded by the factories. Some of the farmers unable to repay their loans resort to suicide, with a record of 200 000 suicides a year.

After these 5 points, you could argue that I am shooting myself in the foot as a fashion blogger and aspiring designer. But I think that above all else, caring and being concerned about the life of others comes as a top priority. We are on this earth to make it a better place and be of service the best way we can, with the little we have. So it’s important to implement the change even if we are alone and on a small scale, talking about these things is crucial for the sustainability of the environment and the well-being of a fellow human being.

What now?

• 1.     SHOP WITH PURPOSE: buy things if you really believe that you need them. By need them, I really mean ‘need’ them (Yes, I am also talking to myself).  As my aunt once told me, not all the things on sale are a sale or helping you save. If it wasn’t part of your budget or expenses and planned for in the first place, well it is not a sale it is an impulse purchase. Since fashion is not disposable, let’s think about why we are buying things.
• 2.   SUPPORT LOCAL DESIGNERS: if you are able to afford it, at least their production process is transparent, as you are able to obtain information about how and who makes the garments and assess whether someone’s life improves in the process.
• 3.   LEARN TO MEND YOUR CLOTHES and not just throw away the garments you purchase from retailers, which are mostly made out of polyester and thus not biodegradable.
• 4.   If you are ABLE TO DESIGN YOUR CLOTHES, you could empower a local tailor by having bespoke creations made for you.
• 5.     MAKE YOUR OWN CLOTHES OR COLLABORATE WITH ANOTHER DESIGNER OR GARMENT CONSTRUCTOR to reduce the cost of production and make ethically produced garments more accessible.
• 6.      Another option is to organise CLOTHES SWAPS with your friends or your community.
• 7.    Lastly, THRIFT SHOPPING OR SHOPPING AT A VINTAGE STORE is very much a thing. At least those clothes are of a better quality if they lasted through time. It is really the only redemption and way to remain timelessly stylish and trending.

LET’S BE CONSCIOUS BUYERS, CURIOUS ABOUT THE CLOTHES WE WEAR AND PURCHASE. LET’S BE AWARE OF THE REALITY OF THOSE WHO MAKE THEM. RESPECT THEM ENOUGH BY BUYING ON PURPOSE AND NOT MERELY PURCHASE THINGS TO QUENCH CONSUMERISM ‘NEEDS’ AND ‘WANTS’ OR JUST HOPPING ONTO THE BANDWAGON EFFECT OF CAPITALISM. KEEP THE CONVERSATION GOING, INQUIRE AND KEEP EDUCATING YOURSELVES AND THOSE AROUND YOU. TELL YOUR TRUTH THROUGH YOUR STYLE, SOME OF THESE TRENDS BLUR OUT YOUR INDIVIDUALITY IF NOT CAREFUL!

Dress: Designed by me and made by a Rwandese Tailor (Made in Rwanda)

Pants: Brett Robson (Made in SA)

Sandals: Masai Sandals (Made in Kenya)

Thread necklaces, earrings and bangles: Inzuki Designs (Made in Rwanda)

Beaded necklace: KZN jeweler (Made in SA)

Blazer: Thrifted

Love and Light

Lessons I learned from the "Power of Fashion Blogging"

Hello there lovelies!

Following my attendance of the “Power of Fashion Blogging” workshop at the Cape Town Fashion Council. I thought I could share some pointers, tips and lessons of what I gathered at the workshop. 

1. Presentation

As a fashion or lifestyle blogger, the gold is in your presentation. To cut it short the ‘VISUALS’.

One thing that was emphasized at the workshop is the blog's presentation. Obviously, as creatives we all have our own way to present our blogs, depending on one’s preferences, artistic expression and other things. However, a minimalist, clean template is always a good thing to have; as you would not want the template to be too busy, distractive or potentially eclipsing your content and pictures.

Secondly, it was highly advised to have clear pictures. Too pixelated does not make your pictures exactly appealing, visually. Let’s not lose ourselves calling it a new form of art; because really it is not one. A picture is great when it tells a story, but a good story is best told when it is relatable and reflecting the reality. A tip: remind your photographer to wipe their lenses for better visibility and clearer pictures and shooting between 5-6PM get you the best lighting.

Thirdly, uniformity when using filters. Obviously, it is no secret by now; all bloggers or most use filters or some other sorts of app to edit their pictures. I have also made some mistakes before when editing and the pictures did not really look the same at the end. Well it’s a big no-no; it doesn’t look tidy or professional. Ideally when using filters or editing, using the same filter is better than using a different filter per picture. 

2.       Content

Keep it Current and Topical. The content of a blog differs depending on the type of blog one has. However certain things are obvious, you cannot call yourself a fashion blogger if you are going to blog about pets most of the time and post your Christmas outfit every other year. When it comes to timing, for example: if it’s close to Valentine’s Day, an ‘outfit inspo’ post has to be published a few days before the D-day, not on Easter. The same thing applies to your purchases. If you buy something that is currently in store, do not make a post about it 6 months later. It does not work in your favour. Another little tip is to use holidays for content inspiration.

God is in the detail. No matter what type of blogger you are, ensuring that there isn’t spelling mistakes is very important. Obviously no one is perfect, and sometimes some silly spelling mistakes slip through our fingers. But double checking those little details will always come in handy. TAKE YOURSELF AND YOUR WORK SERIOUSLY, before everyone else takes you for a joke.

 3.       Collaborations and how to make your blog lucrative

Do not lose yourself-stay hungry, honest and humble (3H).

One fact is that building an audience takes time and patience. Do not lose patience or yourself in the process.  In order to ensure that your audience grows is to remain consistent in terms of the post frequency. Obviously, the more you post the better. However it should never be at the expense of the quality of your pictures and content. It’s important to create ‘your own signature’, something that sets you apart from other bloggers, do not jump on the wagon of following and replicating whatever else is done by every other blogger. STAND OUT!

When your following is still low, it is okay to do product reviews or other collaborations for free. It’s humbling to do something for free while you could get paid; but exposure serves when your following is still relative low. This really applies when the brand’s following is 10,000 times higher than yours. In order to get paid, you need to be bringing something to the table too. Once you get paid and start  receiving free things , do not take anything for granted or grow an ol' big head. A nasty attitude is never pleasant or helpful. 

It’s important to stay honest to yourself, brands and the audience. Your audience has to coincide with your lifestyle and your visuals. For example if you always shop at the lower end of the retail chain, do not expect the high end brands or boutiques to jump at your proposal or e-mail. Simply put, dissonance was never cute. If your audience does not relate to the brand, their customers or their mission statement, it should not shock you if you do not get more than a tap on your Instagram picture (from the brand).

Stay hungry and passionate. Keep on telling your story, keep on doing your research, keep on being YOU most importantly. Do not compare yourself to other bloggers (yes am also speaking to myself here). Do not compare your chapter 1 to someone else’s chapter 20. Some of the reasons why you should not compare your blog are: people blog for different audiences and for different reasons, resources vary and it is the quickest way to kill your creative self. So keep on keeping on, no matter how slow the growth of your audience is. Keep your work excellent, authentic and timely.

Lastly, if you have established a substantial following and you post frequently (as in not on a quarterly basis); do not be afraid to approach brands. Approach them with a precise, concise and innovative proposal. In terms of billing, it differs according to the type of blog one has. For example, if you are promoting a clothing brand. You calculate the total cost of taking pictures (how much you paid the photographer), the outfit (if you were not sent the merchandise), and transportation if you had to go to a far off location and labour (the time taken to write the post or shoot the video). This is applicable to brands which have marketing departments and promotion budgets, of course. 

Style Section: I wore this mosaic print-burgundy- wrap dress to a wedding. I was channeling the 'Bay Area Bohemian' to spice things up. What I love about wrap dresses, they are the best silhouette for an hour-glass shape. A wrap dress holds what needs to be held and accentuate traits I want accentuated like the waist. A maxi dress is obviously the warmer option for a wedding in the fall, paired with ankle boots to  compliment the front slit. In order to integrate the 70s look into your wardrobe, you could get accessories such as a choker and a bucket sling bag with fringes. 

Wrap dress: Legit (in store)

Choker and earrings:Women Street

Rings: FIX

Sling Bag: Mr Price

Ankle Boots: Forever21

When I look to the light

Hey There!!!!!

Still in the Easter mood or nah? Well, personally I am. Hence this post is inspired by my best memories of Easter , growing up,  and spirituality all together. 

Growing up, Easter was a really big deal. My father would want to see all of his children dressed in white. Everyone had to be wearing a white top, shirt or dress. We would all 'pack up' in the car and off to mass. After mass, we would go to some nice restaurant for lunch. Those were the times!

Every time I asked my father why we had to wear white for important events, he said that white represented godliness and clarity. My interpretation of such a holy celebration is such that a royal blue garment is a must wear. Royal blue represents all things royal to me, but also harmony between my physical and spiritual selves.  And darling, these high-waist pants made by Brett Robson (http://shopbrettrobson.com/) are everything honey! There is nothing more elegant than wide leg pants. When the pants are royal blue, it reads daughter of the King all over you!!!

Top: Fix

Pants: Brett Robson

Hand Made Woven Set  (earrings and a bangle):  Inzuki Designs (http://www.inzuki.com)

Love and light!

The other side of a blessing you are never told about

Greetings from the comfort of my couch to the brightness of your screen!!!

Autumn is finally upon us, and I've started prepping for fall!

It's been two weeks without posting, my apologies for that; I needed to be Iyanla and fix this life I live. Talking about the topic of today, we shall be speaking about the other side of blessings: the non-shiny, oh my word what did I sign up for side of it. 

Have you ever wondered what happens in the process of getting to your promise land? 

Have you ever thought what people actually go through, before we see their victories and hear that they've finally made it to wherever they wanted to get? 

The other side of blessings is often overlooked or not spoken about, because it may discourage some or it's just not as catchy and glamorous really * such a Debbie Downer for the optics*. However, it's that part often not  talked about that shapes us, refines our character and strengthens our tenacity. Hence, the desire to share my story, my other side of the blessing of finally doing/studying what I love. 

Four weeks ago, I began my journey as a fashion design student. I waited for 21 years for this to happen. While I was so ecstatic to finally acquire the knowledge of my preferred field of study/occupation; I had to ensure that my other commitments were also fulfilled. I took it upon myself  to combine working on my Masters' thesis with fashion school, from January until Mid-March (the week of submission). 

Before I started fashion school at the end of February; although exhausted by the pressure of grad school, I was able to focus on one thing at a time and things were sort of working well. However when both things were combined, it wasn't as easy as I thought it was going to be. 

Most people think that doing art is so easy, that arts students must be chilling for a living. But is it so though? No! 

One of the things that humbled me, is to see how much work goes into fashion design and art in general. I mean after taking a whole afternoon to draw 10 fashion faces as a homework, my perspective had to change real quick.

Anyway...As I was saying...

The early days of  March began and submission week is now around the corner; meanwhile fashion school's homework are coming in like tomorrow won't be no day. Additionally, here I receive a direct message asking me whether I would want to curate the Rwandan twitter account. I welcomed stress into my life with open arms, because the 'Year of Yes' and daring myself to go out of my comfort zone.  Did I make it to the submission day? Yes, I did. But how did that week go? Chaos, friend, chaos! 

Between the trips from the fashion institute to University, volunteering, trying to make it for submission, homework, curating, living life => I ended up with heavy back-pains, my blood pressure fell and a level of fatigue that knocked me out at 6 PM on Friday to only wake up at 9 AM the following day. But still this is not a train smash. 

Nobody had warned me that fashion school required me to buy stationary every other day. As in, I am seriously competing with my 7 years old brother in terms of stationary ownership. That's not even it, I did not know that I would need an additional machine (an overlocker). See my savings pass me.  

Here I find myself, grateful for finally living the dreams but I am definitely broke now. I cannot afford to go out without planning it like an AGM (Annual General Meeting), I cannot sleep as much as I want to if I have to take public transport to school and not just walk there like I used to. Well, we are not even going to talk about shopping, because that will have to be prepared for months in advance just like how long it takes before the fiscal budget is finalized . 

So as I am sitting down and seeing my bank account's balance, the state of my health and the awaiting responsibilities such as blogging, finding ways to acquire capital, volunteering, being a human, etc. It all boiled down to the fact that  "no greatness is birthed without sacrifices". The route to 'making it' is bumpy, the progress is slow too, some sacrifices hard to endure more than others; BUT IT IS WORTH IT whether I know what's ahead or not. As long as giving up is not even an option, faith can/will take me places.

Coat: Online Purchase (Superbalist)

White Jeggings: PnP Clothing

Shirt: Gift

Bag: Aldo 

Sunglasses: Mr Price

Earrings: FIX

Love, light and keep on dreaming and keep on going even when you feel like giving up!

Bodacious!

Hello there!!!!!

It's been a little while since I posted, missy's life has been A MESS HONEY *Wendy William's voice*!!! 

Jokes, it wasn't that bad. It's just a lot of changes all at the same time. Last week I started fashion school, FINALLY (in life though, I have been waiting for this since high school)!!! While that was happening, I was wrapping up with my Master's thesis. Hence the slight delay. 

Le topic du jour  is all about being BOLD and AUDACIOUS--> BODACIOUS  in the way we approach life. If anyone asked me what I would be doing with my life after grad school, I certainly wouldn't  have said fashion design. I thought that fashion design was a course I will probably take in my mid-thirties. I was not even sure for what purpose, how to go about and what to use the new knowledge for, or how things will work out. It was just a dream I had put on the back burner, swallowed up by the demands of grad school, and what used to be the economic reality of Africa back then. By the time I had to go to college, a career as a fashion designer was not fathomable. 

Despite being doubtful and hesitant about my dream few years ago, I knew that one day it will all come true. Although only parts of the dream have become true, I am even more BODACIOUS and fired up about what's in store. These levels of motivation are, however, not solely sourced from  points of passion and excitement. There is also a presence of fear, doubt, apprehension and limitations. The only difference is that I refuse to let those negative feelings inhibit me and chock the life out of my aspirations. It's not that it's easy and that all things are rosy. But if I am doubtful of myself, who would then believe in me? Besides, how sustainable is it to rely on other people's affirmation of who I am, what I am good at and my destiny in general? 

So in the name of the year of YES (yes, I expect you all to have watched Shonda Rhymes TED talk), be bold and audacious about life. Let your prayers be outrageous (if you have not asked, how can you receive?).  Even if God knows your prayers before you say anything, it's important to make the first step in faith and go for it. Reach out to life, shock yourself about how much you can and will accomplish. Slow progress is better than none, so you will definitely get where you want to be. 

Walk away from those who call you out on your dreams, telling you to be more realistic, the vision was never theirs in the first place. Acknowledge the presence of limitations, but don't let them turn into the belief of who you are what you can accomplish. No one was ever great by dwelling on the impossibility of their ideas. Let your faith in God, yourself and your abilities be the promise you hold on to. It will not be easy, but it will sure be worth it. 

Remain resilient and unapologetic about your future!

Dress: Cotton On

Booties: Forever21

Earrings: Klines

Love and light always!